Epiphanies while walking in the rain with Leo. Book list I binge read in a week. Spotify playlists and feeling lucky for philosophy, epic, geography and all, while in school.
The Binge Watching Queen hits the road
(…and don’t you come back no more, no more, no more, no more?!)
June 1st: I am officially house-less. By definition homeless is “anyone without a home and therefore typically living on the streets” so, to make things clearer, I am not home-less but house-less. My body and my soul are not tied to a contract by which you have to abide, and I don’t have to feel like I am bound to some sort of deal I made with the devil to pay for rents, bills, utilities, management, taxes, money, money, money… whatever. I am actually free. Free to come and go as I want, free to hit the road and go anywhere my car takes me, free to wander and to travel without feeling like I am wasting money on a rent for a place I don’t spend the nights in –(I know, I am weird, but who isn’t really?), free to dream, free to explore, free to get lost and find my way back to some place I still have to find.
As it happens for my binge watching sessions, I could not take this “random wandering” by doing a thing at a time like some people, friends, strangers, have suggested multiple times (even without asking for any kind of opinion, really). They said <<settle first, then on the weekends and when you’re free from work and all, you travel>>. Wrong. Not me. I needed to go all in and to do it now! After all, “What better place than here, what better time than now?” — RATM docet. So I woke up one day, at the end of March, concerned about how to deal with all these obligations while living as a freelancer, taking what is given a day at a time, needing someone else to let me know how and when I had the chance to spend some “kesh” and once the enlightenment came in the form of “just f* it, hit the road and go”, it was like a spark in the back of my head, and a weird feeling I think I can name “joy” (yeah, being so foreign to me I could not really tell what it was but I guess that is what it was!) pervaded my full being and it felt… good. So here I was, a couple of weeks later, sending in my xx-day notice to my building manager, starting to count down the days to… today.
I have decided to document (or at least in part) this adventure, not because of some social media reasons of any kind –also considering I am not an influencer or anyone of that matter, but because I know out there some people are unhappy, wondering what to do with their life, struggling through every single day not knowing exactly what to do, and I would like them to know that if I can do it, with all my bs and all, everyone can. If I can leave everything and everyone behind and go, despite the saying that wolves live in packs, us lone wolves do exist, and we need to go. Therefore you all can look for something else out there, not necessarily better, but definitely different. Sometimes, just because we are used to live in discomfort, we think we’re living in our comfort zones. Instead, those are in reality -uncomfortable- zones we only learned to live in, adapting to them. So much so that real comfort feels strange to us, and we keep struggling without understanding why. Here’s why. We just need to step aside and see things from another perspective. Yes I know, “freedom can be frightening, if you’ve never felt it” as my beloved LP used to sing. Eh. But I guess it is worth a shot. If not, we can always go back. Somewhere. Or simply keep moving.
So here’s to you out there not knowing what to do. But also to you who like to sneak in and have a look. And also you keeping an eye out for me, willing to know what I am doing, where I am going, what I am thinking …creepy, I know, but keep in mind that “if it does not offend or hurt anybody, do whatever you like”. So cheers! Here’s to each and everyone of you. And to me. Ding.
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