HTGAWM’s Annalise Keating and #metoo

Reviews

The reason I am here tonight is simple: after many years I realize I am not special, I am not “the unlucky one”, I am not different, I am not the only one, I am not #guilty. Since the Weinstein case came out on the news a few weeks ago, memories from the past -that never goes away- start playing in my head every time I stop to read about the testimonies of these women who, one by one, are finally denouncing the abuses and the sexual assaults they have been victim of, either in the past or in the current years.

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I had the same feeling when, thanks to my savior –the music-, I coped with adolescence and its aftereffects, becoming aware of the sad reality that sees many of us undergo mistreatments and abuses, accepting that “a trouble shared is a trouble halved”, and that we are all in this together. Still, whilst the sense of impotence and helplessness you get by feeling wronged by the world, the human existence and the mortal condition belong to boys and girls indiscriminately, it appears that what is going on right now is a massive uprising of female voices that, for many (too many) years, have been silenced. Muted by fear, by abusers, by society itself.

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Among the ones tweeting and sharing their “me too” message to make the world aware of a problem that has been smearing this sick sad society for centuries, there are not only women though. The oppressed, whether females, males, straight or gay, eventually felt they were strong enough and ready to speak up. There was no need to explain in detail, you only had to say “me too”, as if we were in school, the teacher asked a question and we had to raise our hands. Well, thank you Alyssa Milano for calling out to us victims of this broken system via social-media. Most of all, thank you Tarana Burke -credited by Alyssa, for creating this movement, more than 10 years ago, and that only now is coming to surface. Back then, Tarana wanted to help young women of color who were survivors of sexual abuse and exploitation, and who were not heard or believed. Today, everyone can be heard, we hope.

The picture is getting clearer, isn’t it? If you have been watching How to get away with murder these past few years, you can’t help but think of Annalise Keating, the protagonist of another great TV-show born from the magical mind of Shonda Rhimes. Let’s first have a look at the plot of the series:

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How to get away with murder

Genre: they want to call it “legal thriller drama”
Created byPeter Nowalk
StarringViola DavisBilly BrownAlfred EnochKatie FindlayJack FalaheeMatt McGorryAja Naomi KingKarla SouzaCharlie WeberLiza WeilConrad Ricamora
Watched on: Hulu and TV (FOX Italy)
Four Seasons, Sixty Episodes (48 aired so far) watched in: religious schedule of #TGIT.

Annalise Keating is a great lawyer, the best apparently, from what we understand, and also a Professor of Law at Middleton University in Philadelphia. Beyond her most trusted collaborators Frank and Bonnie, she picks five students to intern for her: Wes, Connor, Michaela, Asher, and Laurel. They work together to solve crimes that, through both flashbacks and flash-forwards, seem to be all related to one big homicide in which they are all involved: Sam, Annalise’s husband has been murdered because of his affair with Lila, a student at Middleton, who was killed before Sam, by someone unknown. One of the suspects, Rebecca, is a girl with whom Wes falls in love, and who turns everything into a big chaotic mess. Oh, Rebecca dies as well. Trust me, this is no spoiler alert as the rabbit hole has not even been crossed yet. By the end of season three, in fact, everything is literally screwed up and season four, which started almost three weeks ago, promises nothing but more troubles.

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Going back to Annalise and the “me too” movement, it first needs to be said that sensitive topics in the TV-show are obviously present (it is a crime drama after all), rape is condemned, although kept hidden for years, and sexual assault can be analyzed following several procedures, but it is not up to me, right now, to go deep into this kind of digression.

We need to focus on Annalise, and in particular, her relationship with her mother. The most intense moment in the whole series, from my point of view, is in the episode where the mother appears in the show, and the spectator can finally connect a few dots of the complicated story behind who Annalise, called Anna Mae by her mother, really is. The two women seem to have a weird bond: a strong mother and a strong daughter, who is eventually weak and misunderstood, start talking about their past, with Anna Mae accusing her mother of ignoring the sexual abuses she suffered because of her uncle. This is revealed by the touching scene when Annalise shouts “Did you know what he did to me?” until her mom starts listing the names, through the history of rape in their family, of those who did it to her and her sister, with a teacher and a reverend included. What strikes the most, and what hurts like a stab wound right between the back of your shoulders is hearing her words when she adds “Men take things! They’ve been taking things from women since the beginning of time, and it ain’t no reason to talk about it and get all messy everywhere. Certainly no reason to go to a head shrink or for help.” Wrong. It is and it was necessary to say it. To denounce it. To protect those who will come after, because no more people have to become victims. No more.

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Annalise’s self-worth, just like every victim’s confidence, was permanently scarred. Knowing her mother and her aunt had been violated did not make things easier, sharing the pain does not make it go away and it certainly does not cancel what caused the pain in the first place. Yet, by the end of the episode we realize that yes, silence has been reigning upon the family for years, the truth has been neglected for the quiet life, but eventually Annalise’s mother took care of her daughter’s abuser her own way: she burned the house while the uncle was drunk asleep on the couch, making it appear as if the fire started because of his cigarette falling. Being bright and kind of manipulative seems to be genetic in this family, although even the most dreadful action  is done for the greater good, sacrificing a person’s freedom for the sake of someone else’s life.

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Is it real then? Sexual harassment has been going on since the beginning of time so there is no need to make such a big deal out of it? Isn’t this like saying that if something has always been done that way, then there is no need to change it, although it is kind of obvious that it is deeply and terribly wrong? Eh, just think about it. Not a day, one.single.day passes by without having us (yes, I call myself in) molested, although we learned to just “accept” it, and move on. You walk down the street and that person approaches you “Hey pretty…” and you start walking faster to keep the distance. You stop at the traffic light waiting for the green light to cross, nobody is walking near you, and those people in their car start honking, at you, because there is no one else around; while they’re shouting obnoxious words you try to give them the evil stare, but they’re already mimicking oral sex right before your eyes. This to name just a few, of those moments that cannot be defined as “rare”, when you just “let it happen” because there is nothing that you can do. Sometimes you try to react, you shout back at these beasts, you show them the finger, always fearing a reaction, picturing yourself running because they could get mad or even overexcited because of what may seem like a fearless woman. Those other times though, you just shut up, with your blood boiling inside because you know that you can’t beat the pack if they attack, while going back from class, alone, on a Venetian day in spring, along a narrow calle that skirts the canal where four big men are unloading a boat. One points at you, so you look down: “ughhh, on that one I’d lie for hours pushing and pushing and pushing until she begs to stop”.

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Again, these are just a little part of the verbal assaults that we have to deal with since when we are born, with -let me say unfortunately for the time being-, a vagina. I won’t go over the actual physical assaults (and I am addressing only female victims for the sake of time and space in here, so allow me to focus on vagina owners for now) because those, as Annalise shows us, leave a mark on you that will never go away, and if you too can’t help but shed a tear while listening to Pink singing “that’s when dickhead put his hands on me” in U + UR hand during your morning run, giving a start to a list of flashbacks, well, just know that although this won’t change the past, you’re not the only one, you’re not alone, it is not your fault, you’re not wrong, you are a survivor.

See? I told you my reviews would be kind of alternative! All things considered, TV-series are fiction, but there is some truth in every fictional story.

 

 

Again …on shaved heads, after #USElections

Haircut Madness

0b5e9f68f3e565f98942cc81a0841e02Along with Natalie Portman in V for Vendetta and Charlize Theron in Mad Max, the recurring image when I stare at myself in the mirror is Britney Spears many years ago. I do not recall what year it was, and I may be too lazy to actually google it so I will just use what I remember from that time. The world was under shock because apparently everybody believed she lost her mind just because she shaved her head. Is this the truth? Do we have to be mad crazy, as women, to have our hair cut so short? Should this practice be considered an actual purge, for whatever sin we want to expiate?britney-spears-shaves-her-head-bald-britney-pictures Pink, the singer, had short hair forever and nobody thought she is crazy. I guess it is a matter of seeing a person actually change her look. People are reluctant to change. I do believe this more than ever, now. People fear change, and by trying to deceive themselves choosing what they believe will make a difference, they actually pick the “good ole option” that makes them feel secure. I will go back to this in a minute.

People are reluctant to change

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Buddhists and other “religious” monks get their heads shaved as to show their beliefs, the way they want to disconnect from earthly connections while getting closer to God. The only thing that I can think of while reading “getting closer to God” is that NIN’s song which is way different in meaning, and if you want to know more, just go check it out. Nine Inch Nails apart, this thing of believing that getting your head shaved makes you lose individuality or strength has to stop. Why? Because this is exactly how I felt while seeing chunks of my hair falling, at the hairdresser’s. Yes, I confess. This socially conceived practice as a disruptive way to “say something”,  was embedded in me, until I actually had to personally feel it. And dislike it. Maybe that is why Samson was the very first figure I could feel related to, and I am not even a religious person.  More than this, it was disturbing to think of judgements from people, how they could identify me as a skinhead nowadays, symbolizing aggression in a world where apparently you need to shock the average human being in order to get a reaction. Last but not least, as some said “you look more badass” I was bothered by the thought that boy-looking girls lack of femininity (Ruby Rose is not feminine then? Come on!), leading to the most straightforward question “Are you a lesbian?” …because even if I were, I cannot see how that would be a problem, but the tone of their voices while asking that question made me upset. In other words, I was dead tired of having judgmental human beings define me, and in a way, this is why this blog came into existence.

reasons-why-you-have-to-see-ruby-rose-liveIn so many ways I am now untouchable. Only those who are not devoured by their own preconceptions get closer to me, and as I got used to my aloneness -not loneliness- it is somewhat funny to try them, watch them, and experiment all this on me. Society makes you and others believe that only with Pantene-looking silky hair you can be attractive and pleasing to the rest, that if your appearance does not stick to the norm (a norm created by whom, exactly?) you are an outcast, a problem to be solved, sometimes a threat. But, if you are a threat, then they will try to belittle you because by saying you are threatening they are giving you power, and people are so sensitive to power or what they believe this power is, that they need to kick you out of the game. Although you were not even playing and you honestly were not even giving a damn about it!

nbc-fires-donald-trump-after-he-calls-mexicans-rapists-and-drug-runnersThe results of these elections, here where my home is now, made me ponder (as if being an over thinker at times were not enough). I have always dreamt of “the land of the free and the home of the brave“, willing to be part of it, to live in and on it. I was not considering these humans though. Humans are humans, no matter where you go, and I am sorry (or maybe not) if the way I am formulating this sentence is for any reason offending you. Humans rely on fear. People fear the newly elected President of the United States because of what he said, or did, or said he would do, being scared of his power… without realizing they are the ones giving him power. As part of a -society-, human beings have “the power to give power”, or to take it away as far as I am concerned, as I thought they were doing, judging me, when I feared they could define who I was. Shame on me!

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…and while most humans are freaking out over Trump‘s victory, the future, and what may or may not happen, on a more positive note I would ask: “what if he tricked you (who voted for him and not) all? What if he knew that saying what many wanted him to say he got all the votes he needed, if counting on misogyny, racism, violence, etc he actually got you all at his feet and now he is going to screw you all over by acting humane (in the way humane should be defined)? Oh man, this would be tremendously beautiful. Music to my ears in my imaginative world. An act of intelligence taken to its finest! Is he that intelligent though? We do not know yet. Berlusconi definitely was not. But that’s another story… This may be wishful thinking, but it definitely sounds more interesting than overdramatize, because remember people: you create what you can imagine. Learn how to imagine properly and stop fearing people’s power, because it is you all giving powers to the people you fear. Ugh, wisdom.Guess what getting a haircut can do to you! Meanwhile, in Massachusetts, this view:
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